Stopped from Sleepwalking

I've had an amazing moment of "awakening" today. I haven't realized what a sleepwalker I've become. Not in the sense of sleepwalking while I sleep, I mean sleep walking through my life. Through motherhood. I cannot imagine how many precious moments I've missed being "too busy" with work, drama, life, worries, 1st marriage, then 2nd marriage, "what ifs", "shoulda, coulda, woulda" I think to myself how sad...How terribly sad to say that I've overlooked so many of the blessings that I truly have.

Here's how this all came about - today. Yes, today.

I was looking through my website and emails when I received an updated facebook entry. So I go to check it, which leads me to another link, which leads me to another link with a great blog on motherhood, which lead me here: Kayleigh's Story
Which then lead me here: Kayleigh's Video

This story changed my life today. When people ask me "what is your conversion story?" I will mention today. (The first being approximately 7 years ago.)

I haven't cried like I cried today in a LONG time. I "woke up" to the realization of just how selfish I had been, ungrateful, angry and stupid I have been to have overlooked the LOVE I really have in my life. Nothing - NOTHING - matters anymore. Just my children and my wonderful husband. Money, things, circumstances, ignorant/arrogant people who've torn me down in the past, do not matter anymore. How clean my house is, how perfect my drawers are organized, how much business I draw in, doesn't matter. I am so blessed and I can't believe that although I've said it before, I never truly believed it until today. God filled me with a love today that I have not felt in I don't even know how long. I dropped everything and held my children. Josh 5, Ben 3, Sophia 8 mo and Imanni 13. I kissed them and told them how much I truly loved them. I then called my husband and told him that we can no longer waste a moment complaining about anything in our lives anymore. No matter what - we have eachother and we have our children.

Kaleigh has fought for her life, her parents have stood strong for her and I can rest assured that nothing NOTHING matters more to them than having their baby girl with them. My earnest prayers go out for them with all I have in me. I will make sure to keep them in prayer regularly. They have blessed me in such a huge way and I have never even met them.
Thank you for sharing your story and waking up this sleepwalking mother.